 The Shaffer Journal
Volume 6 Issue 3 March 2000
[Internet Stuff] [Hockey Puck] [Guest Meows! Cat Chat 1 2 3 4]
[The Mountains of Ao] [Poetry Corner] [The Dull Stuff] [Guest Articles] [In The Keys]
Kitty Talk
These journals are dedicated to Kitty GreyCat's spirit. She is at RainBow Bridge now. We all loved you, Kitty! Click the cat graphic to visit her Memorial page. Kitty born June 6, 1982. Died July 9, 1997.
 This is Abby and let’s do the list of all birfdays, anniversaries, and holidazes: March 1st Larry was commissioned a naval officer in 1987, 8th Ash Wednesday, 17th Abby’s birthday, and 17th St. Patrick’s Day. This is Ebony, and I like the weather better so far. It is good lizard hunting weather. But when the day come to an end, I hafta come inside. I don’t want to and growl my complaints, but human bean not listen to me. Once inside I have to paw wap at Abby as she try to be furrriendly and play. I is just not in the mood. Yet Abby not leaf me alone. We get to running up and down the fifth wheel. Soon I be hiding behind or under the couch. Abby try to get me out, but I just paw at her keeping her at bay. I do that with human bean too. I accidentally scratched his nose though. I not mean to do that, but bean heal fast. When I get really riled up, I jump on human bean’s chair and make it go around and around. Now that is fun. It funner when human bean in the chair. He sure surprised when I do that. After all that I is ready to settle down for a long catnap on my blanket on the couch. Human bean pet me some too. Soon I is fast asleep doing some heavy catnapping. I dream of fat, lazy lizards jumping off the air conditioner into my mouth. I like this dream very much, I do! Now hare is dee Abby cat. I am Abraxas or the Abby cat. Dat Ebony meow too long and put you all to sleep I meow. I have important mews. My birthday come up dee 17th. I expect everyone to send me catnip, some live boids, a tender mouse or two, chickie be nice as mice, and a lizard dat bigger dan Ebony’s. I not asking furr much. Sew I nose you all will be nice and get these fings furr me. Use not hab to wrap it up needer. Wrapping just get in the way of fun. You nose dat I be a whole three years old now. Dat be 28 in human bean ears. Sew I am a nice lady cat and hab not been a kitten furr a long time. Although I do act like a kitten a lot. I just can’t help it, because girl cats just want to have fun. I even have plenty of fun with Ebony outside too. I used to be too scaredy cat, but not anymore. I still don’t like the big propane truck. When that come along, I got to the trailer door and yeow very loudly. Human bean come running and let me in. When the big boomie fingee go away, I want back out. I got to watch Ebony closely. When she catch lizards, I got to go over and steal me some. Ebony let me, because she not want to admit she hab sum momma cat stinks in her. When I done wearing out dem lizards, I fink Ebony eats those yucky fings. I prefurr fishier doe. And I like chickie a whole lot of meows. Pounce yummies bee dee berry furry bestest in da world. Well, that is our meows diss fine month ub March. Internet Stuff
As an artist looking for good ways to get published, there is a new service online at http://1stbooks.com. 1st Books will publish your artwork on the internet and at many participating bookstores. They don’t accept everyone like vanity publishers and no one like the big New York publishers. If you have a good product, 1st Books will publish you electronically and printed & bound. You can opt for the promotional package which increases sales. You may submit your work either electronically or hard copy. The charges are the best anywhere too. An initial setup is $459.00, electronic distribution is $0.00, printed & bound distribution is $450.00, and the promotional package is $300.00. $300.00 of the setup is refundable, and you get the first $300.00 of sales. Royalty is 40% not like the normal 5% to 15% others give. We all like to ensure our privacy and keep information out of the wrong hands while browsing the internet. There are now services that offer this kind of protection. You sign up and basically use their servers from which to surf the net. One such service is called SpacePROXY at http://www.spaceproxy.com. As far as our own website http://RunesofAo.com, we are running an ad campaign all over the world through Microsoft’s bCentral service which used to be called Link Exchange. So look for our banner when you are surfing the net having fun. Also you can reach all our websites from our domain which is listed above. The Yahoo! GeoCities saga continues. They’ve FrontPage enabled their servers, but can’t get the nifty features to work right. I’ve complained several times. In The Keys
The annual Gulfstream Trailer Park and Marina party took place a few days ago. Everyone turned out for the 50s and 60s Rock ‘n Roll extravaganza. Tables were decorated for the theme and many individuals sported colorful dress dating back to the 50s and 60s era. There was music from a fine band playing period pieces. Food and drink were just super as always. The best time was when the ice cream and cookies came out. All this was blessed by the most fantastic Florida Keys sunset. I know everyone is already looking forward to next year’s party and get together. Just too much fun! On a different topic: Why do newspapers and magazine have to split up articles across different pages? I can see a front page story being split off to another page to fit more front page stories on the front page. Yet when you go to secondary inside articles, they are split off to another page and even another section sometimes. Then the split can spread to other pages or sections, until you don’t know where you are. The magazine or paper is all wadded up now and useless not to mention your nerves are split too. I really don’t see how it would hurt to put all articles, except possibly the front page stuff, all together in a linear sequence. What? Is there a law or something I don’t know about? Why is this so hard? Where is 60 Minutes when you need them? I will stop complaining now. Just had to get that out of my system. I’ve really enjoyed the bike trail that goes the length of Marathon. I usually run from the park to mile marker 47 just before you get to the Seven Mile Bridge. Round trip that is about 4.5 miles. I see a lot of other runners, some walkers, and a few bikers on the bike path. They always wave and say hello. I don’t pay attention too much, since I think mostly of when I can stop jogging. I really love to run, and it is good for my health. Yet during the slow run that I do, I just can’t wait until it is over. I will try to run 1000 miles this year. Hopefully, I can swim a lot of laps at the pool too. I have finally solved the problem of trying to turn left onto US 1. I just turn right and go down to the new light at the middle school. I turn right at the light and right into the parking lot. I go to the exit and turn left to end up at the light. When the light turns green, I turn successfully left onto US 1. This sounds barely interesting I know, but turning left onto US 1 during any season is hard. You could wait until next month, and there is no gap in the traffic. I find that it is so much faster to just goto the light down the road a bit to turn left onto US 1. Well, that is another month in paradise on our island called Key Vaca. Island living agrees with me. The weather is super, and I love living here among friends. Guest Meows!
 This is Larry for Ariel. She and her two cats, Harry and Emily, gave us some wonderful Cat Chat articles this month. We are gratified that we can offer this regular article about some wonderful cats and their human bean with visits by a dragon! Please visit the Memorial Page for Ariel's mother. Click the cat wagging its tail graphic to visit their net home. Thank you. Now here is Harry, Chester, and Emily with Cat Chat:
Cat Chat 2-3-00
Learning To Fly
Chester: The cats were so upset about the snow last week that they forgot it was my turn to do a column!
Emily: Well, it were important! Dis kinda stuff hab to be meowed bout, yous nose!
Chester: Did I say anything? I let you two meow all you wanted about the snow. But now it's my turn. And I've got important stuff to talk about too!
Emily: OK...(sigh) we did tell yous you could hab da next column. So, what is it dat yous tink be so portant to talk bout here?
Chester: I want to talk about my flying. See, I'm getting bigger now. In fact, I'm growing every day, I bet!
Harry: Yeah, purrty soon you'll be bigger than the whole trailer! Heehee!
Chester: Humph! I'm not getting that big that fast! But I am getting bigger, and my wings are getting longer. I'm bigger than Harry now, and even longer with my tail. So, when I fly around the house...
Emily: Yous knock tings ober! Heehee! And Mom get mad too!
Chester: She doesn't get mad, really. She just doesn't want me breaking anything. And I always put the stuff back! But I can't help it! My wing tips almost scrape the walls...
Harry: Oh, dream on! They don't even come close!
Chester: They do in some places. The halls are narrow in here, you know! And whenever I try to fly into the kitchen, if I try to fly around the computer desk I knock stuff off the wall, and if I try to fly over it, I knock stuff off the top.
Emily: Yeah, Mom weren't happy atall when you knocked her glass uny-korn offn the desk top!
Chester: At least it fell on the carpet and didn't break. I didn't mean to knock it off. My tail just kind of trailed down, and well, there it went! Anyway, I can fly up to the stove now...
Harry: Huh! I could jump up on the stove fur always. Big deal!
Chester: Flying and jumping are two different things! And I can fly up to the top of the refrigerator too! Only there isn't much room to land, because Mom has so much stuff up there.
Emily: Mom hab so much stuffers eberywhere! Well, her an Girlfriend. Dis place be packed wid stuffers, I meow!
Chester: It is indeed! And that is rather the problem. Mom wants me to do my flying practice outside. Where I can't knock stuff over. The only problem is, it's been awfully cold outside!
Harry: It sure has! I don't go out cept fur a minute or two in the morning. Well, what Mom calls morning. It's really bout middle of the day, I meow!
Chester: Mom is just a night person, that's all. Anyway, that's fine with me, because the sun is warmer then, on sunny days anyway. So, I've been going out on the porch and practicing in the yard. Once I start flying I warm up. It's good exercise. There's a lot more room out there. I can't really get good loft in the house.
Emily: Now he's talkin bout loft! There isn't no loft's in the house! I nose what a loft is. It's a place up high, like a big shelf thingy.
Chester: I'm talking about height and air currents, not big shelves, silly cat! Anyway, I've been trying out my flying muscles a lot lately...that is, when it's not snowing or anything. I can fly up almost to the top of the crabapple tree real easily, and up to the top of the trailer if it's not windy. The tree is easier, because I can just sort of glide downhill, especially if I catch a good air current. The birds get really upset when I fly into the tree, though! Heehee!
Emily: Yeah, I seed them. They gets all flittery and squawky like. It's funny, specially cause them big ole crows is so mean an nasty, but they is sceered ub Chester! I bet they thinks to themselfes, they's neber seed a bird that big! Mweeheehee!
Chester: I don't know if they're scared or not, but they sure do fly away in a hurry, cussing at me in bird talk the whole time. Haahaahaa! That's lots of fun. I've flown down to the bottom of the yard, but I can't get up into the big trees yet. Mom says when it gets warmer there will be these things called thermals that I can catch and fly higher.
Harry: I thought thermals were stuffers that beans wore under their clotheses when it's cold!
Chester: Well, they are, but they're also pockets of warm air. I've seen the hawks flying way up high on the thermals. That's what I want to do. It looks so neat. The just glide around up there like it's nothing at all to fly.
Emily: Chester thinks he's all fancy cause he can fly around now. He thinks he's gonna be a hawk or somethin. Talking bout thermalies like he nose what he's talkin bout! He's only bin flying outdoors a couple ub weeks!
Chester: I've been reading up on all this on the Web, though. I know all about termals and wind velocity and loft and drag and...
Harry: There he goes, being all full of himself again! I thought we'd got past that after the Year of the Dragon thing.
Emily: Shhh! Yous shouldn'ta mentioned dat! He'd furgot bout it!
Chester: I haven't forgotten. Why can you cats be full of yourselves and I can't, eh?
Harry: Cause yous a dragon and we are cats, that's why! So there!
Chester: Well, I'm a magic dragon and you're not. So there! But, the point is, Mom's happy that I'm learning to fly outside. Only she says I shouldn't leave the yard because some mean human might try to steal me, or worse! So I'm being careful. Or I will be, when I can fly that far!
Emily: But...yous sposed to fly us up to da moon, member?
Chester: (chuckle) Well, it will be a while yet. By the time I can do that, I think I can make sure no mean human can steal me. After all, I've got to work on my fire-breathing too. That will stop any mean humans.
Harry: Too bad yous can't fire breathe all the snow away!
Chester: Yes. Maybe next year...
Cat Chat 2-14-00
Fiery Breathing
Chester: Well, after last week's column I got to thinking that I really should go outside and try to breathe fire on all that nasty snow and ice that Mom was so unhappy about and melt it. So I went out, and it was sunny, but very very cold. And I breathed on the ice on the driveway just as hot as I could. It melted too, for a minute or two, then it froze again. I tried and tried and tried but no matter how hot I breathed the puddles I made just froze again. I was so frustrated I was about to cry, except I didn't want my tears to freeze on my face! And it was awfully cold out there!
Harry: It sure was! I wasn't even about to stick my nose out there, and I got fur all over me.
Emily: Yeah, but I don't unnerstand. Ifn the ice got melted, shouldn't the air have got warmer? I mean, it alays seem like the air is warmer when there isn't no ice...well mosta the time anyway.
Chester: I thought that might work too, but I think it must work the other way. The air has to get warmer first, then the ice melts.
Emily: Then why didn't yous jus breath on the air an warm it up then?
Chester: I tried that too, but it didn't work. I breathed and breathed and breathed, but the air didn't get one bit warmer!
Harry: I don't think alla the dragons in the world breathing fire coulda warmed up the air. Yous did the best yous could, Chester.
Chester: I know, but I still wish I could have melted the ice for Mom. But I'm still not a very big dragon, after all. Anyway, after a while Mom made me come back in, and I was so cold! So me and Mom and Harry and Emily and Girlfriend all snuggled down in the warm big bed with the electric blankets and got all cozy and napped. And after a couple of more days the weather got warmer all by itself and the ice and snow started to melt and Mom and Girlfriend got to go in and out and in and out with their cars like they like to do.
Emily: Are yous sure dat da weader gots warm all by its own self? Maybe it was one ub them dailied reactionaries from you breathing on the air before.
Chester: I don't think so. That would have been one heck of a delayed reaction! It was a couple days before it started to melt and several more before all the snow was gone. In fact it wasn't all gone until it rained a few days ago.
Harry: Well, something warmed the air up. Maybe angels breathed on it and made it warm. There's lots and lots of angels, and I bet they could do stuffers like that.
Emily: But ifn angels breathed on it to make it warm, why would they go and let it be cold in the first place? It jus don't make no sense atall! We don't neber need it to be cold and icy and stuffers like dat. So why not jus let it be nice an warm alla da time?
Chester: You know, I've been reading about that. See, there are a lot of plants that need the cold weather to rest in, like, so in the Spring they can grow big and happy and healthy.
Emily: Who cares bout some ole plants!
Harry: Ifn there weren't any plants, the mousies wouldn't have nothing to eat, so there wouldn't be any mousies fur us to eat! And the birdies, they eat the berries and seeds and stuffers from the plants, so they need the plants too or else there wold be any birdies to catch.
Chester: That's right! And the animals that make ham and turkey and beef and stuff like that eat plants too. So without the plants, we'd all be hungry. Besides, me and Mom and Girlfriend eat lots of plants.
Emily: Yous do? I neber seed yous eatin plants!
Chester: Of course we do. You know, stuff like salad and yams and carrots and spinach and potatoes and all kinds of things like that.
Emily: Those are plants? I neber nosed dat! Plants are things that grow out from da ground and stuffers. All dat stuff yous all eat comes from da grocery store!
Harry: But it grows up form the ground first. Chester is right. I nose cause one year Mom tried to grow a garden. It was a furry small garden, just turnip greens and tomatoes. The tomatoes never growed at all, but I saw Mom pick lots of those turnip greens and boil them all limp and eat them up like yous eats yum-yums! That is, 'til the bugses gots into them and then there weren't no more turnip greens, and Mom decided gardening was too much trouble.
Emily: I guess, yous nose, tinking bouts it, ifn dar wasn't no plants dar would be no fun places to splore and hide in, and no shady places in da Summer, and no fun good-smelly leafs to chase in the Fall. So I guess it's ok to have it be cold sometime, cause it don't really be cold all dat much. Too much fur me, but den it alays gets warm agin. But nothing needs to grow in the driveway, so I thinks dem angels needs to make it warm there so Mom and Girlfriend won't get their cars stuck and cuss and fall and get hurt. Dat's what I tinks! Dem angels needs to tink bout dat kinda stuffers!
Harry: I agree. There's no reason atall that it has to mess up everything jus so the plants grow nice. There should be a way the angels can make the driveway stay warm and still keep other stuff cold like it needs to be.
Chester: I don't think they can control it that well. I think it's all or nothing. After all, this weather thing has been going on for a long long time, even longer than Mom has been alive. If they had a way to make this place snowy and cold and the place right next to it warm I think they would have figured it out by now!
Harry: I guess you're right. You'd think that angels would have got it all down pat by now, ifn they could. I bet ifn they had kitty angels to help them they could figure out a way to keep Mom's driveway without ice and snow on it!
Emily: Hey! Yeah! I bet yous right. Yous oughta tell Peanut Butter to go talk to da angels what make the weather and tell them they need angel kitties to help. Eberyone nose dat kitties be da smartest peoples there is. I just bet they could figger out how to do it all jus right!
Harry: Absol-utly! I'll go talk to Peanut right now and see what he says. I bet he'll know how to talk to those angels real good.
Chester: You know, for once I think you cats might be on to something! Anyway, it can't hurt. And it sure sounds better than me going out in the cold again and trying to breath away the snow!
Cat Chat 2-16-00
Mom Sick Agin!
Harry: we don't nose how it happened, but Mom got sick again!
Emily: An dis be twicet in just a couple months!! I nose Girlfriend hab bin sick a lot dis year too. Dat's why she bin staying ober at her old trailer a lot a lot. But Mom, she don't hardly eber get really sick, really. Not enuff to stay in da bed like she hab bin dis week!
Chester: Well, there's been a lot of flues and viruses going around this year. I've read about it on the Web. But I thought that was just normal for humans to get sick this time of year, especially since Girlfriend has been sick too.
Harry: It's not normal for Mom. She's had I think maybe one bad cold in the last two years!
Emily: Well, she's sniffly and snuffly alla time, cause a she got alleygees, an sometime she get snifflyer, or her tummy don't feel all so hot maybe fur a day, but she hab had it bad dis year fur sure! An wid purr Girlfriend bein sick too, it bin real bad. Course, since Girlfriend goes and bees sick ober at her old trailer, we can't take care ub her like we oughta be able to, you nose?
Harry: That's furry true. We gotta find a way to keep Girlfriend here so as we can take good good care of her alla time like we do Mom.
Emily: Yeah, we tooked real extra good care ub Mom dis week. An we worked hard at it too!
Chester: We sure did! Poor Mom! She was coughing for a couple of days, but didn't really think much about it. Then she woke up Sunday all moaning and dragging around. She said her throat hurt. Well, she kinda said that, but she could hardly talk. And she was coughing and sneezing and all kinds of stuff like that. So I helped her get out the cat food so we could all eat, and got out her cereal for her. I would have brought her her tea, but the mug is too heavy for me to lift still, and I still can't get into the refrigerator to get the milk.
Emily: Yeah, I don't unnerstand dat. Da frigadater door don't look no heavier dan da cat food cupboard door. How come you can't open it?
Chester: I don't have to fly up to grab the knob for the cat food cupboard. I haven't quite gotten down flying and pulling at the same time.
Emily: Oh, well, not that it matters to us...
Harry: It matters to me! Chester could get my special milk out ifn he could open the fridgadater!
Chester: I'll figure it out! Just give me some time. Anyway, we were talking about taking care of Mom!
Emily: Oh, yeah! Well, after she fed us...
Chester: With my help!
Emily: Yeah, wid Chester's hep, she went straight on back to bed an only got up to get her tea. On she stayed in bed all all dat day and da next and da next too, cept fur when Grandpa bean come to take her to da bean vet bean. So we all snuggled up with her and kept her nice and cozy and warm.
Harry: Yeah , we made sure her covers were all rumpled up real good, with plenty of cat hair on them so as she would be comfortable. And we all slept together, and me and Emily didn't even fight or nothing, cause we nosed Mom needed to sleep, so we were furry good.
Chester: I helped her find the remote controls to the TV, because they kept getting hidden in the covers. And she kept wanting to watch these movies with subtitles, but she was sleepy and kept closing her eyes, so I'd read the subtitles for her. I even got her oranges to eat. I cut them up all by myself too!
Harry: Yeah, and got orangy juice all over the counter! What a mess!
Chester: I cleaned it up...after a while...
Harry: After I meowed to you bout it!
Chester: Well, so, I was busy taking care of Mom! It wasn't allthat sticky!
Harry: Was too! My paws stuck to the counter! Yuck! I hate orange juice!
Chester: Ohh, it's yummy! Almost as good a candied yams!
Emily: You and your sweet toothers! Heehee! Anyways, I wished dat Girlfriend would commode ober to take care ub Mom. But she talked to me ober da phone an said she had jus got ober all dis nasty bean sickness stuffers and didn't want to get it Agin. I guess I can't blame her. It can't be fun getting sick, an sides, den yous hab to go to da bean vet bean, which gotta be jus as bad as goin to da cat vet bean, and that's turrible!
Harry: It sure is! The worst thing that can happen to a kitty! Hey, Chester, you've never been to the vet bean. How come?
Chester: Um, er, well...I don't think they see dragons...
Emily: Heehee! He's jus sceered causea what we's tol him. I bet they'd be happy to gib yous shots an stuffers, Chester! Mweeheehee!!
Chester: Am not! They just don't have dragon vets! Mom says people should know about me cause they might steal me, anyway!
Emily: Chester's a sceerdy cat! Chester's a sceerdy cat! Heeheehee!
Chester: Am not! And anyway, we were talking about Mom! So, finally about Wednesday Mom got up a little and did a little work on the computer, answering e-mail mostly. Then she had to go back to bed.
Harry: She had to cancel all her guitar classes too! She was really sick. But she is mostly better now, and Girlfriend even came back over, since she said Mom isn't cantankerous anymore.
Chester: That contagious! Heehee!
Harry: Same thing, I meow! Mweeheehee! But it was kinda nice snuggling in bed with Mom fur days and days, even if she was sick. I don't want her to be sick agin, but I wish she would snuggle in bed more.
Emily: Yeah that would be nice, fur sure. Maybe ifn we's unplugged the puter she would come snuggle more...
Chester: Naw, she'd just plug it back in. We'll just have to take the snuggling when we can get it I guess.
Emily: I guess so. At least Mom is feeling better, and Girlfriend is coming back, so that's what matters, I meow!
Cat Chat 2-24-00
Water Cats
Chester: I've been noticing something strange about you, Emily...
Emily: What does yous mean, somethin strange! I's not strange atall! (pouting)
Chester: Yes, you are, actually...
Emily Am not!
Chester: Are too!
Emily: Am not!
Chester: Are too!
Harry: Wait a second. Chester, what do yous mean, that Emily is strange? I mean, I nose she's fat, but that's not furry strange fur a kitty.
Emily: I'm not fat! I'm jus horizontically challenged is all! Yous is all bein mean to me! I'm leaving!
Chester: No, wait, Em, I didn't mean to upset you, really. It's just that, well, you seem to like water a lot. Most cats don't like water at all.
Harry: What do yous mean? All kitties drink water. I drink lots and lots. It's not as good as milk, but it's good...
Chester: That's not what I mean. Emily likes to have water drip on her. That's very strange, because most cats don't like to get wet.
Harry: Yeah, that is purrty strange, I meow! Heehee! Emily: Yeah, but getting dripped on isn't like bein wet atall! It's jus fun, is all.
Chester: How can that be fun? I don't understand.
Emily: It's like a game, yous nose? I mean, it's not like I get really wet. It don't get down to my skin or nothin. I jus likes catching the water droppies on my fur, an I gets to lick dem off. It's lotsa fun! I specially likes it when Mom leaves da water drippin in da sink, yous nose, an I can catch it wid my paw an play wid it, an let it drip on my back an my tail an stuffers, an it's a furry fun game! Heehee!
Harry: Yous is one strange kitty-cat, that's fur sure! Heehee. But, I members dat Peanut Butter liked to lay in the rain, when it was just sprinkling, yous nose? And he liked to let his fur get wet. So maybe it's just something that some kitties like. I sure don't like it tho! Not atall!
 Emily: Well, I tinks it's furry fun, so long as I don't gets at da way wet!
Chester: I don't understand the difference. Wet is wet! I love to get wet. I mean, I love to shower with Mom and Girlfriend and get scrubbed really good. That feels so good! So, why, if you like to get dripped on, don't you come into the shower with us?
Emily: But dat's completally different! Den I would gets all all wet right down to da skin! I hates dat! Meeeroow! Dat's jus not right fur no kitty no way!
Harry: I agree there. There's nothing worse than getting wet all down to the skin. Mom has given me baths before, before she found those little flea-stopper drops what she puts on our necks in the summertime. And let me tell yous, it was almost worse than going to the vet bean!! Mom got me soaked and put this smelly stuffers on me and washed and rubbed and no matter how I tried I couldn't get loose! And then, like that wasn't enuff, she had to go and rub me dry sorta and ruffle my fur all up! I tell yous, I took me two hours of washing to get my fur to lay down right. And I was mad as a doggie at her too! Baths are horrible things!
Emily: I member I used to like to jump into da tub after da water was all runned out after Mom had took a baff, and watch da water go down da hole where it go down. Dat's jus da neatest ting to watch. But, anyways, one day I tought da tub were all mostly empty but it weren't, an I gots my feet all wet way up my legs! Well! I gots outta dar faster dan fast, I tell yous! It were horrible!
Chester: Heeheehee! You cats are funny! You want to get a little wet, but not all the way wet. You just can't make up your minds!
Harry: Not making up our minds is part of our jobs! I thought you nosed that! Anyways, I'll tell yous both something funnier. Yous nose Miss Priss...well, you never met her, Chester, but yous heard me talk bout her...
Emily: I member her some. She weren't furry nice to me!
Harry: She wasn't furry nice to any kitty, and she always would insist that she was the head of the house, when everybody nosed that I always been the head of this house...
Emily: Sure, Harry...(snicker)
Harry: I heard that! Well, anyways, Miss Priss and me, we fought alla time, so I thought this was just the funniest thing. See, one day, Miss Priss was walking long the edge of the tub when Mom was taking a bath. Miss Priss always liked to walk around the edge of the tub, but she didn't like even a drop of water on her. Well, this day, there musta been some water on the edge of the tub cause she slipped and fell in! We heard this yowl and she come outta there like a nasty doggie was chasing her, and soaked from her head to her tail! I was laffing so hard my tummy hurt, it was so funny! Course she didn't like being laffed at neither, and was already all mad like a wasp, and gave me a good smack but I didn't care. It served her right acting all uppity alla time! Mweeheehee!!!
Emily: Heehee! Dat sound like it were funny! I wished I coulda seed it. But I'm sure glad it weren't me!
Harry: Oh, me too! I nose better than to mess round with tubs, that's fur sure!
Chester: I guess I'm just never going to understand you cats. You are just plain contrary! Besides, baths are fun!
Emily: Well, we'll jus let yous all our baffs fur us. We'll just stay clear ub dat nasty water! Cept fur some little drips! Heehee!
Harry: Not even little drips. Yous two can play in the water all you want. I'll just drink it, and laff when yous gets all wet! Mweeheehee!
Cat Chat is © 1999 - 2008, 2009 Ariel, Emily, Harry, and Chester the Dragon. All rights reserved worldwide. This column may not be reprinted in part or whole without express permission of Ariel. Poetry Corner
“A Child Sighs” 2.21.00 by L. E. Shaffer
Lonely star shines
A child sighs
Come upon the wind
A breeze to dry these tears
Once when we were young
We lived and laughed
Stars stood by and sang
Melancholy times so dear
Play upon the mind
Images once in kind
Moon shines dearly
And a child sighs
Transformation so near
Lonely skies starry tears
Blues play slowly
As in whispery wind
Standing on a hill
Wanting to fly one last time
Remembering all the times past
The child sighs with the wind
Starry skies on moonlit night
Silence upon the gentle lake
The owl flutters its feathers
And a lonely star sparkles
One last magical moment
All that is left of childhood
Take flight fleet spirit
And a child sighs...
© 2000 L. E. Shaffer Hockey Puck
The Florida Panthers have had a terrible month this February as compared to previous successful months. Pavel Bure keeps scoring and providing the offensive punch needed, but the defense has not been up to par. The defense has let the opponent shoot far too often. Shot totals were way high in February. Even goaltenders as good as Mike Vernon and Trevor Kidd cannot keep the other team from scoring if shot totals are too high. The defense also helps out on offense and has provided extra scoring when needed. During February the defense was for the most part silent. Most hockey clubs go through a stretch where things just don’t go right. Fortunately, the Panthers have had their bad stretch in February. Their first game in March against a very good Toronto Maple Leafs team just could be the start of a very good month. They beat the Maple Leafs in every facet of the game. The Florida Panthers will need a good month of March as the Washington Capitals are hot on their heels in the divisional race, only two points or one game behind. If the Panthers can peak now at the end of the season and into the playoff, who knows how far they will go? They certainly are a Stanley Cup caliber team. Guest Articles
We have two poems this month from two great poets. Katje aka Anita Wilson gives us a touch of winter, while Dace explains an extraordinary afternoon. “Winter” 2.22.00 by A. Wilson
At the end of autumn
When winter is coming
A cold wind starts blowing
Scouring the ground
Then on a gray day
As by magic it happens
White fluffy snowflakes
Fall quietly to earth
Transforming a dark land
Into a fairy land of crystals
Trees look mysterious
Decked out in white
The world is a wonder
Covered by a white blanket
Winters ugliness is hidden
It is Nature at peace
© 2000 Anita Wilson
“Untitled” 2.25.00 by Dace
We met on a San Francisco afternoon
she took a picture of the sky
so I brought her around
and showed her the ground
I bought her a book where the wild things are
and we ate with the crackle dragon
eating roasted rabbit in hazy garlic Tuesday
we ran through the rain with roses on our breath
she always buys cheap umbrellas
because she always seems to leave them behind
wet and breathless
we laughed
deep dark beauty
kiss on the cheek
America.
© 2000 dace The Mountains of Ao
Tears from Ao and two poetry collections, Pages of Life and Visions of Life, are available electronically at http://RunesofAo.com/aobp/. The Runes of Ao project, The Mountains of Ao novel currently at chapter 13 of 22, and the Moments of Life poetry collection are all works in progress. Also a collaboration with K. Young on a novella called Dragon Embers continues with a future publication on the webzine called The Outer Rim. The Dull Stuff
The online journal contains extra content. The printed version is limited to three pages to keep printing costs down. Inputs and letters to this journal are subject to approval by Ebony and Abby. Submittals may be edited for content and become the property of:
Shaffer Novels/Poetry Company
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Internet URLs: http://RunesofAo.com
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Publication date: March 1, 2000
Author: L. E. Shaffer
Company: Shaffer Novels/Poetry Company &
Shaffer Internet Publishing Company
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